20 Brutal Truths I've Learned About Health, Wealth, Relationships, and Happiness That Will Lead To A Better Life in 2024 (And Beyond)
~ "Forget the word “diet”. It’s made up."
Every day you get slapped in the face.
Not by people. By life.
These are not gentle slaps. These are the slaps you get when being interrogated in a North Korean prison. Full force. Full contact. Full pain.
And they will come for you, whether you like it or not.
They will come in your teens with your first break-up. Or in your 20s when you found out that social media was killing your joy to live. Or in your mid-30s with a cancer scare.
And behind every mark these slaps leave on you there’s a lesson. Life teaching you what doesn’t work.
But it’s not like high school. There’s no test to see if you got the message.
Life doesn’t care. Life goes on.
And I learned this the hard way.
90% of the truths below took me years (even decades) to learn. Usually when the situation got so bad I had to either change or else I was f*cked. The other 10%? Thankfully I learned before there was no coming back.
So here are the 20 brutal truths I’ve learned in the past 20+ years.
Health
99% of doctors don’t know how to fix a problem. They know how to mask problems. If you want to stop popping pills to survive, find the ones that will fix the problem.
“Shit in, shit out”. That’s what a manager said in one of my previous jobs. It was about our data. But the same applies to your body. Don’t expect to be bursting with energy if you stuff your face with Burger King, Pepsi, and a Milka Orea chocolate bar 4 times a week (expect to feel miserable)
Forget the word “diet”. It’s made up. You either eat 20 healthy meals out of 21 or you don’t. The word diet makes you feel good while you make no progress towards being healthier. It’s a temporary thing that keeps holding you back like a metal ball chained to your ankle.
Losing weight is about volume and calories. Aim to eat a lot of volume while keeping calories down. This means eating more fruits and vegetables than anything else (yes, I’m biased towards a plant-based diet). This doesn’t mean turning into a tree-hugging vegan. Just means less animal products.
I once heard a guy complain his genetics were bad. That’s why he couldn’t lose weight. He said that while eating an entire package of muffins and half a jar of Nutella. Don’t be like that. Take responsibility.
You’re always decaying. Invest in your health now so there’s less pain 30 years down the road.
Expect to be mocked if you focus on healthier habits when you’re surrounded by people with an unhealthy lifestyle.
Wealth
Current retirement plan of 99% of people is based on a lot of hope. Hope inflation stays under control. Hope you don’t get laid off in 40 years. Hope Wall Street is a good boi and returns 7% on average. Hope you won’t die before 65. Hope the government will take care of me.
90% of people preaching compound interest didn’t get rich with compound interest. And the ones that got rich had to wait 70 years before they started enjoying their money. This also doesn’t mean compound interest is a bad strategy. It works… but with large amounts of money.
Investing 10% of a small salary every month won’t guarantee your retirement. Better to get a high-paying skill that enables you to save 50% of a large salary.
Buying a house is a personal choice. You have to decide for yourself. In both cases, make sure you’re using your money wisely.
Relationships
Porn is dragging your life down. It’s a drug. It will screw your relationships, kill your motivation, and destroy your joy to live (check out my book notes on Your Brain On Porn).
Short-term partners won’t make you happy. But don’t settle for someone you don’t like just because they’re there and you don’t feel like going back to dating.
You can’t build a relationship on looks. They always fade away. Best to build a relationship on memories and experiences with a long-term partner.
If you treat people like shit when they’re young, don’t expect royal treatment when you’re old.
You can’t have more than 5 close friends. That’s because you’re limited by time. The top 5 people in your life take up 60% of your time. That’s why it’s so hard to keep up with friends when they start to build a family. You’re not a priority anymore. Their family is.
For guys out there, stop punching walls. Anger is not the only feeling you can have. It’s OK to express other feelings as well. Especially with a partner.
Happiness
You were not built to look at a glowing rectangle that floods your brain with dopamine for 17 hours a day. Go outside. Interact with people. Smile at life. That’s where happiness is.
Internal benchmarks are more important than external ones. Stop comparing yourself to other people. It doesn’t matter if they drive a nicer car, make more money, or have a nicer home. The real question is “Are YOU happy?”
The grass looks greener on the other side because it's full of shit. Nobody has the perfect life they build on social media. It’s all fake. All fabricated to highlight the best microseconds of their lives. Don’t compare someone in the Caribbean 2 weeks ago sipping champagne to you lying in bed on a Tuesday night preparing for work the next day.
One last advice
My job is not to convince you.
My job is to show you there are other ways to think about different areas of your life.
Your job is to investigate and figure out which ones make sense. And which ones are full of sh*t.
What are your brutal truths? Comment below!