8 Lies Ruining Your Life (And Keeping Your From Getting Ahead of 99% of People)
~ #3 - The newest iPhone will make you happy
You get exposed to billions of ideas every day.
They help to shape how you see the world.
Sometimes they help you. Other times they screw you over. And as life gets harder, it gets easier to use excuses as crutches.
Let’s go over the top 8 you’re (probably) using every day that keep you from reaching your goals and getting ahead of 99% of people.
Belief #1: You’re one microwave solution away from success
I started writing in 2022.
Every 2 months I doubt myself.
“I don’t see anything happening. I’m doing something wrong.”
Then what do I do?
I go on a hunt, trying to find the missing secret.
This translates to online courses from “gurus”.
“Buy my course and be prepared to make so much money you’ll quit your job, buy a mansion, and travel the world. All in 30 days”
Sold!
I watch the videos hoping to learn mind-blowing advice that will “unlock my full potential”.
I watch 1, 2, 5 videos. Some good advice here and there (like having a content calendar).
But no silver bullet… No single piece of advice to unlock my success. No shortcut to fame and glory. Just best practices tied to the same advice:
“Do the work”
“Do the work for a long time”
And there’s a reason why I keep buying courses with seductive promises.
They make you think you can skip the hard work (process). And jump straight into the glory (the event).
They make it seem you’re an idea, pill, or app away from your dream.
The truth is there’s no shortcut to doing the work.
You can get smarter about how you do things. But you can’t skip the process. The daily work to get to the event:
Want to lose weight? Exercise and eat healthy every day. Then look fit.
Want to be a famous book author? Write every day. Then get a book deal.
Want to start a business? Work every day. Then sell your company for millions.
If you want permanent change in your life, forget shortcuts.
Show up every day. Make it your life. Your identity. Run towards the pain and you’ll get the reward.
Belief #2: Saying you don’t know how to do something is a valid excuse
15 years ago, I existed in only 2 versions in school.
Smart version. This happened whenever I did well in a test. My mother would praise me for being smart.
Complete idiot version. This happened whenever I sucked on a test. I wouldn’t tell my mother. I just felt like an idiot.
After 15 years, I finally figured out what happened.
Labels f*ck you up.
Why?
Because they brainwash you into a fixed mindset.
I convinced myself studying was stupid. I either knew everything without studying. Or I was too dumb to learn. There was no middle ground. Motivation destroyed. With a single label.
And once you internalize these labels, it’s easy to apply them to your life. It’s a permanent excuse as to why you can’t succeed. Then you see someone driving a nice car and think:
“Lucky bastard!”
“He must be a genius!”
“He must know the right people”
This is why I have a mini-stroke when I see people praising their kids on fixed traits.
“They’re smart”. “They’re shy”. “They’re good with numbers”.
They’re putting their kids into set drawers. Training them to think they can’t pick a new drawer and grow.
But not all is lost. There is a solution for this. It’s called the Kaizen principle. It has 3 simple rules:
Small incremental improvements. What matters is getting better every day. It doesn’t matter how small it is. Keep moving the needle. Daily.
Skill mastery over performance. Focus on getting better. Forget the fame and glory you might get someday due to some future talent.
No external comparisons. There will always be someone better than you. Forget the top 1%. Compare your current self to your old self from 1 month ago. It’s a better metric. And it will keep you motivated.
Combine the Kaizen principle with a growth mindset and your life will never be the same.
Belief #3: The newest iPhone will make you happy
I remember when I got my first iPhone.
After saving for months, I finally got my hands on the neatly designed white box from Apple.
Then a month later it was just another junk I had to worry about.
From the moment you are born you’re taught to associate happiness with new toys. As you get older, you keep thinking the same way.
Happiness = new toys
But as you get older, your toys also evolve. It’s not just a new iPhone. It’s a new car. Some will be so expensive you’ll have to convince people to give your new toy now, promising to pay back in 60 months.
And no matter how great your new toy is, it won’t make you happy long-term.
And all those hours of your life you traded for money? Gone.
But people don’t care. They wanna keep buying. Some rich folks buy so much they go broke (think lottery winners, professional athletes, Nicolas Cage). So are already broke, but just keep buying.
Every purchase you make is a little slice of your life. Make sure you’re spending your life rations in a smart way.
Belief #4: You can get rich by chasing money
Money is not a real thing.
It’s made up to make it easier to exchange value, instead of you having to offer to fix a lamp for 2 potatoes.
So if you want money, you gotta create value.
Think of billionaires. They created massive value. So people showered them with money.
But most people don’t care. They want the money without working for it.
If you’ve been brainwashed by money, here’s a quote from the book to help you:
[...] erase “money” from your vocabulary. Vow to never utter the word again. As a producer, start thinking of “money” as value-vouchers—a store of perceived value produced, communicated, and delivered to the world.
If you want money, start producing value. The more people you affect, the more money you’ll have.
Belief #5: You’re poor because billionaires exist
I have zero sympathy for billionaires.
But I can’t deny they created massive value over their lives.
I’m typing this on Windows because of Bill Gates. On a keyboard because of Dell. On a desk because of IKEA.
Yes, there’s the occasional rotten apple. But most billionaires are billionaires because they’ve dedicated their entire lives to creating value.
And if you want to join the millionaire/billionaire group, that’s what you have to do.
Stop focusing on what you want and focus on other people’s selfish needs. It’s the only way to make money.
Belief #6: You believe you’re unlucky
Old people love to complain.
“I can’t lower my cholesterol”
“I have back problems”
“I can’t lose weight”
And they always have the same thing in common: they think their problems just happened. Just a lack of luck.
This lets them think they can’t do anything to change their situation. They blame a higher force for their problems so they don’t have to face them.
Sorry to break it to you… If your life sucks right now, it’s 99% your fault.
Life is what happens after a billion choices are made.
You don’t gain weight overnight. You gain over time.
You don’t get back problems overnight. You get it over time.
You don’t get high cholesterol overnight. You get it over time.
If you want your life to suck less, stop transferring responsibility to other people. And start making better decisions.
Belief #7: Live like a pauper and die like a king
Most personal finance books I’ve read taught me one thing.
To save money until you’re rich.
So I’ve been saving 10% of my salary religiously for 12+ years.
I’m still nowhere close to retiring. Nor buying my first house.
If I go back to these finance books, they’ll tell me to “cut expenses”.
But there’s only so much I can cut before I’m living off canned beans.
And the promise is that I’ll have all the riches I want. But only if I can save every penny I make.
The problem?
I’m focusing on the wrong side of the net income equation.
Net income = income - expenses
99% of people focus on the expense part. They think cutting off Starbucks from their lives will make them millions in the long run. It might… in 40 years. But what happens if you die 30 years from now?
That’s why MJ says in his book Unscripted that you should focus on the income side.
Increase your income so you don’t have to cut every joy from your life.
Belief #8, You hope the stock market will make you rich
In January 2019 I bought my first Apple shares.
Now, 5 years later, they’ve exploded in value.
460% return.
Do you think I’m on my way to my private island to enjoy retirement?
Ha… No. I bought 500 euros. And now they’re worth 2k.
And this is my best pick. But for every “Apple” I bought, there were another 3 rotten apples. For example, my worst 3 picks are:
Fiverr: -89%
Lemonade: -80%
Wix: -58%
But the guy X says you should invest little by little, and you’ll be a millionaire by age 89!
2 years ago a friend messaged me saying he wanted to “make money in the stock market”.
I asked what his initial plan was.
He said “To finish this guy’s course. Then I’ll start making money”.
The problem here is that the guy “teaching” you to invest didn’t get rich investing. He got rich selling courses!
His portfolio is in the millions. But it works because he has millions working for him.
Gurus love to convince you that you can be rich like them. And that all it takes is buying some stocks.
But this dream is as fake as Gucci bags I saw for $30 in Spain during Christmas.
The truth is when you start investing, you learn the stock market is not all roses. And no course will prepare you for a 50% drop in all your stocks.
I’m not saying you shouldn’t invest. But be careful about the illusion being sold in online courses. To truly make money work for you, you gotta have a large income that enables you to save a lot of that.
This article is for informational purposes only, it should not be considered financial, tax or legal advice. Consult a financial professional before making any major financial decisions.